Wild Rainbow:
The Story of Vlasta and Šárka
Parable from April 2023
A retelling of the story of Libuše, Vlasta, and Šárka...
Libuše was the youngest of three daughters. One was an amazing herbalist and healer, the other a priestess, but Libuše was a seer and prophetess. She ruled the land after her father, the son of Czech, died. She ruled peacefully and with great empathy and kindness, and it was only after the people’s patriarchal views begged her to take a husband that she did so, but that is another story, filled with magic and prophecy too.
Libuše and her husband Přemysl ruled together for many years, until she died, and he took over. The result was disastrous in the eyes of the many powerful women raised under Libuše’s sweet words and spirit, and her generous leadership. One woman, Vlasta, decided to do something about it. She couldn’t stand the apathy and iron hand she felt subjected to. As a former general, who lost her position the moment her queen died, she knew how to fight. She gathered the remaining female soldiers, and took over Devín Castle, planning to rule differently, and cast Přemysl out.
She was seen numerous times training battalions of women, and some of the more politically minded of them created policies where everyone was supported and well fed. Women could live and love freely, and children were supported in their every whim and wish. And everytime the men tried to attack the castle and take back the land, they were squandered.
One day, Vlasta knew it was time to go offensive. She designed a plan to kill Přemysl’s most valiant commander. Šárka, the most beautiful of all the women and Vlasta’s lieutenant, was tied to a tree in one of the men’s frequently visited corridors. She was dressed in thin robes, and tied with a hunting horn hanging around her neck and a jug of mead at her feet. Ctirad, in leading his men past her, stopped immediately at the sight of her, dismounting his horse and running to her side.
C: My lady - why are you tied so?
Š: They tied me. Vlasta’s maidens tied me to this tree for refusing to join them!
C: Those skanks. Why would they do that to you? I would never tie up a woman like you. And they call me a sexist!
Š: You’re far too kind. I always knew there were men like you out there, that not all men were bad. For you my lord are more valiant than all of them put together.
C: I am?
Š: Yes, of course. You ran to my side while they ran away from it!
C: Let me cut you down.
Š: No! I prefer it this way, looking at you tied by my wrists. I like the feeling better now with you in front of me.
C: But I must help you!
Š: See? A true man. You may do one thing for me.
C: What’s that?
Š: See this jug of mead at my feet? They left it for me if I ever broke free.
C: And the hunting horn?
Š: I- uh-
C: A cruel joke.
Š: Exactly.
C: Well you must be thirsty, drink, drink!
Š: No, no. I see your men are tired– I know they must be exhausted. A woman always sacrifices, always puts the needs of the wiser sex before her own. I will drink by the stream when you cut me down. Enjoy this mead! How even crueler it would be to the women for their mead to be drunk by the men they so hate!
C: If you insist. Men?
Men: Huh? What? Yes commander! At attention!! Up, up, up. (ad. lib)
C: Drink this mead, on behalf of our lady. After me, of course. (he gulps some mead)
Š: To the merriment of all before me!
C: You are too kind. Pass this around! Drink my dear brothers in arms! This woman – this woman – this woman–(he starts to sway, blinking his eyes) I– oh dear.
Š: What is it?
All the men start to sway. It should look ridiculous– all of them mirroring each other as they fall to the ground asleep. Ctirad grasps around him, for Šárka’s waist next to him to steady his fall.
Š: My lord! What– what does you wrong? I should have known it was a trick. I am so sorry dear commander. It is my fault for suggesting it. I shouldn’t have. I shouldn’t have.
C: It’s alright my flower. I can– no I fear I cannot cut you down now.
Š: The hunting horn! The hunting horn! Blow it! Perhaps someone else can save us!
C: I knew you were clever as well as sweet.
Š: Shall I blow it myself? If you can just– no? My lord? (he is sinking to the ground) Sire? (He is asleep. Rolling her eyes, she takes a hand out of her ties and presses the horn to her lips. She blows, hard. Immediately we hear a war cry from the surrounding woods. It’s Vlasta, leading guerilla fighters in an attack! The women flood the landscape, and Šárka unties herself completely now from the tree.)
In the Czech legend, all the men are slaughtered at this moment. But perhaps a reimagined version could be, they “put a knife up to his boner”– in the words of Scene Queen’s song “Pink Rover”– still all hard from Šárka’s charms.
Either way– they are dead meat.
The women continue the war, but Přemysl decides to put an end to it the hard way. In a bloodbath of a battle, Vlasta perishes when she leads the women too soon before they’re ready for the fight, and though Šárka survives, she is captured. Two versions of the story exist for her death. One, she was killed by the men who captured her. The other is that she refused to die on their own terms, and leapt to her death instead just half a mile from where she charmed Ctirad and his men. There is a park now dedicated to her in Prague 6 where all of this happened called Divoká Šárka, which means “Wild Rainbow”. Perhaps it’s named that (after her no less) because she was so beautiful. Or because she had died arcing towards the forest floor. Or perhaps it is because she was a wild and untamed woman, with layers of wit, beauty, and calculating cleverness in her arsenal that she used despite men’s expectations and opinions. I like to believe she loved her people and the women she fought for so courageously with a wild and passionate heart. And you can remember her any time you look to the sky, seeing a stream of iridescent colors leaping to the floor of this great dome we live in... Perhaps it’s Šárka, washing her sweet hair and casting a rainbow of colors in the sky as the sun streams through the water of her mist.